Poetry submitted by Nathalie (threehorses) on Thursday, July 17, 2003 at 7:38AM :

Holding you

This was it, one year ago, on the floor.
We found you lying face down, sure you were dead.
Still as soil; another layer of sediment in your room.

The moment passed, and you were up again
A whirlwind of confusion, and crossing eyes
Disjointed, not yet with us, not yet gone.

We fed you milk, and orange juice
Laying our hands carefully on you, lest you break.
Not knowing you were already broken.

What happened when you were gone?
You look around stunned, ask who the man is
Standing at the front door.

There is no one there, we tell you
Looking to make sure we’re right
Not really sure we’re right at all.

You’re not you at all, this morning
But in the courtyard I fall on my knees
And send showers of thanks to heaven for you at all.

Later, I tuck you in, like a child, so carefully.
For the first time in years, you let me hold you.
I stroke your hair, and tell you what day it is.

I smell you, feel your forehead, cool and smooth.
I’m amazed you’ll let me touch you,
Only to find you’re gone again, lost in dreams.

One week later, you were gone for good.
Lost in my dreams now, maybe only a dream
But for the smell and feel of you that day.
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